Monday, August 29, 2005
Saw my guardian angel today, right before dusk. Or at least I saw the white butterfly that was to be my sign he is watching over me. In 1998 my dad was in the final stages of cancer and had my stepmom call family members so he could say good-bye. I went and saw my dad everyday but when he tried to tell me goodbye I would change the subject. This went on for 2 weeks. Everyone had talked with him and said their goodbyes. I was daddy's little girl and he had always been there for me, how could I let him go? One day I was sitting with him and saw how much pain he was in and knew I had to say goodbye. I got up from the chair and sat on his bed and started to cry. I told dad that I didn't want to let him go but I knew it was time. He took my hand and told me if I would say goodbye he would always be my guardian angel. He would watch over me and I would know he was there. I ask how I would know and he said whenever I saw a white butterfly it would be him just dropping by to say hi and he hadn't forgotten me. I gave my dad a hug and kiss and we both cried and then I went home. I woke up at 4am the next morning and knew I had to get to my dad. He lived an hour away but my daughter Melody drove me. When she pulled up in the drive I jumped out of the car and ran to the door. My stepsister met me and told me my dad was dying. I ran to his room and took his hand. He looked up at me, smiled and drew his last breath. But he kept his promise to me and the day of his service my brothers and I saw a white butterfly land on one of the flower arrangements and just sit there. (it was a cold rainy Oct day). Whenever I am at the end of my rope, sad, mad or stressed and start talking to my dad, I feel him listening and know he is watching over me. This evening I was sitting on the deck looking at a box of pictures my brother Don had given me. There was one of my dad out in the yard with me climbing on his back. I looked at the picture and said a silent thank you to daddy for being there for me and giving me so many happy memories. A few minutes later he flew by just to let me know he was still here for me. I am so blessed to have had such a special dad in my life.